Distracted.

omg. she's damn cute right? i know. hahaha. if only chinese girls in singapore looks somewhat like her. oooh. wash eyes.

ok, back to coding

Her.

im insane.

i have an imaginary friend.

she's cute. she likes old sch rock and she's one hell of a rocker chick.

cute face, sweet voice, lovely eyes.

If only you were True.

I'd fall for you anytime. HAHAHA.

see? toldya im insane.

R.A.T. 9

this is a motherfucking cool shit ass bitch mouse. if only i could get my hands on this. hahaha. looks waay cooler then razer mouses dont you think?

we're in and we're out.

in and out. byebye .

follow the flow. live life. read books. skate. . music. go sch. do your fucking homework qam. pls.

i miss writing looong essays.

decipher.

Many among so very few

there's quite a number of ppl in my life. so some of the things i say might not be about you. (whoever 'you' are).

stupid playground makes me sick. hahaha. fail.

oh! and just wanna say that im taking drivers' license during the holidays. whee!

me.

you've changed me. i think you made it worse.

angry, hated motherfucker. i am

Worse

distant. changed. we are.

intrigue

poetry. very intriguing.

im practicing intrigue.

im evil. im always praying for your downfall just because you caused mine.

im forever going to feel this way untill the day you fall.

life is a bitch, get along.

fucking stupid statement.

life isnt a bitch if you will it not. dumbass.

im listening to some stupid song.

and im so disgusted with you "act cute". if you are really that type of person, just fuck off from my life please. will be greatly appreciated.

secret.

not keeping anything from you.

just keeping it to myself.

im just waiting.

life is about waiting...for the right moment to act.

omg. oh fuck!

went to sch for progress check. bla bla bla. SCH. sheesh.

forgot to bring the letter for retard. damn. tot of rewriting while i was in sch. was reading book then totally forgot all abt it. hahaha. fail me.

met her at bishan. she wore this nice black denim jacket. damn nice. seriously. then we went orchard. failed a few time. walked in circles. hahah!!

then kakak called asking where i am. then we rushed to meet her at wisma.

she kept looking at amy one kind. i felt a grim disturbance. oh wells.

then paid like...7.60 for 2 coffees? heheh. kakak the best. =D

treated retard, tho she wanted to pay. but a promise is a promise girl. sorry. hehehe.

went borders. looked at books. i kept noticing the sadistic books. we bitched about him the whole time we were there. we're mean ppl. hahhaah. but what to do, him being as he is.

then we went amk, met the rest there. shocked to see him there. taik. but oh wells. hahaha. i just love it when my retard tells me funny stories. her face when she expresses it...damn funny. hahah.

first impression eh amy. "oh shit! walk away qam. keep walking."

then we are what we are now. HunterGirl and Wizardboy. (coz you hunter and i always wanted to be a wizard. heh).

went home, played game. now time to sleep. goodnight world.

oh yea, we saw this cute kitty when otw to makan. =)

HOW WAS THIS NOT PUBLISHED? SUPPOSED TO BE YESTERDAY. DUMBFUCK.

Father Ov Terror.

meeting my mental patient tmr.

she owes me loads of stories. personal ones too.

hahaha.

SAMAIRE ARMSTRONG IS MY STEADY LOVE. <3

Amidst the Chaos.

I woke up this morning, vaccuumed the house and had breakfast. Honeybunches of oats. yum.

STILL, im having this lazy/tired attitude. gotta do my project, read my book and clean my room.

meeting Ammarah tommorow. But i gotta go to sch first. got progress check.

The tiny glimmer ov hope is fading. what would i have to do to make it shine as brightly? i dont know.

Hope that they all die. Oh, i would LOVE that. Tho onli one of them has affected my life. the rest, not much.

Retard buddy has some issues with some people, few of those are which i hate. gotta hear it all from HER on weds. meeting kakak too. weds is gonna be full of ice blast. =/

You are the Moon ov my Nights.

She's hot in every way. and im also referring to you, my friend.

thanks 'friend' for appearing into my life.

hate post again.

I simply ddont like him. He's lame, idiotic, sort of an attention seeker and most of all, he ruins my life.

Motherfucker. I just wished you'd die. what to you have that i dont? Fuck. Im tearing again. Im so vulnerable. Why? I really....yes i do. But...oh well.

That's all you can say, qamarul rabbani? Pathetic. I knw how it feels. Be patient. Remember what kelvin and ferrik said? Hahaha. I fucking laughed at that.

Well, at least she still....yes. Make use of it. Maybe one day...dont you want that? I'm pretty sure you do. Why the hate post? Dumbass. She reads, u die. Dont make her worry bout you. Coz one day, she's gonna be tired of it. Of all this bullshit you do...so pls, stop.

You just live life. Bored? Study, read your book, do your project, fund a job during holidays, take the driver's licence, go jamming, work on the fall. See? You've got alot to do this holiday. Your life isnt boring. Compared to others...sure you're living as if you've no father. So dont be like him. Pls. You will ruin your own life...
Alright, go finish your book. Hekp your mum. Or she wont give you ur $60. Then u cant treat your beloved retard buddy...

I'll leave you to think. Bear in mind what ferril said. Theres a glimmer of it...

Take care my child. Be strong.

Happy Valentines

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love." - Neil Gaiman.

Mother.

sometimes i really do HATE my mum. for the moment.

every mistakes that i do, she make such a big fuss and go all about how my other siblings arent like this, that they are way better then me and im always the troublemaker.

the worse thing, "you wanna be like your father issit?" or "you really are you father's son".

FUCK. you really want me to be like your husband issit? knn.

i've got enough to think about. my sch and my own life. i dont need this from you. all i need is encouragement.

this is how i feel anyways. my elder will sure to FUCKING disagree with me and make me think that im wrong.

im like my mother. im on my own now. like how she was during her time.

and she said she doesnt wanna be like her mother. well, she's approx 20% of that.

Happy Lonely Valentines Qamarul.

Wednesday.

damn. supposed to meet Ammarah buddy at woodlands around 1.30-ish. then mum asked me to do chore before i go out. dammit. could've at least talked abit. oh wells. maybe next time. go borders and starbucks. hahaha.

met yas and wira instead. diq wanted to study.

went town. met kakak at starbucks. discounted. hee! supposed to be free uhh. but too bad under surveillance. then went borders. that's all.

bla bla bla...oh well.

i guess bla bla bla bla bla bla. but, bla bla bla bla bla... =/

bodoh!

EH PUKIMAK TKMO EMO LA SIAL! KENTAL PE KAU.

BUAT MALU JER.

Altered.

things have changed.

the way we talk, how we greet our jokes etc.

idk. hahaha. kay enough.

dont wanna make it worse.

forget i ever typed this. i dont even wanna type this. coz im bored and im taking a break from msn and reading, im typing this. lalala~ hahaha.

homework and assignments

♥ YUZALINA ** says:

*u seee. dont alwaes think bout urself. be happy for her if u really love her

*u cnt be behaving lk dat.

*it'll make her feel worse

3 stuffs to hand in tmr. shitzzz.

left my mouse pad at ayie's. nabei.

i wanna read my book pls!!

worried.

there's many things im worried about.

but it all comes down to one thing.

FUTURE.

yes, i do have a phobia of the future.

im worried bout my studies, whether what im doing in life right now will be worth while or not, about some of my friends, my retard buddy, and my mum.

im fearing that i might fail a module and would have to retake it next YEAR. fucking waste of time. im down with a sprained ankle, cant do drum tracking and video record on weds. fuck. i wanted to cover 4 LOG songs.

im worried bout my health too. im not exactly the healthy eater. my mum constantly reminds me, "you dad is diabetic, dont follow in his footsteps. cut down on ur sweet stuffs and coffee".

i love coffee and sweet stuffs. guess i'll have to cut down on that. better start to frequent the gym. at least once a week.

and you're not the onli person in my life. so dont be affected about what i write here. might not be referring to you. well, sometimes it does. again. not referring to you. yea. maybe you. HAHAHA!! i love screwing up ppl's minds. implant fear and paranoia into their minds.

im so evil. diam laa~

right. study time.